Recovery Poem

My 11 year old daughter was reading poetry to me this morning before school from a wonderful book by Shel Silverstein and I was very struck by one:

Morgan’s Curse
By Shel Silverstein

Followin’ the trail on the old treasure map,
I came to the spot that said “Dig right here.”
And four feet down my spade struck wood
Just where the map said a chest would appear.
But carved in the side were written these words:
“A curse upon he who disturbs this gold.”
Signed, Morgan the Pirate, Scourge of the Seas.
I read these words and my blood ran cold.
So here I sit upon untold wealth
Tryin’ to figure which is worse:
How much do I need this gold?
And how much do I need this curse?

For those readers who are in recovery or who know someone who is, I know that returning to the addiction looks and smells like a treasure for the moment; "untold wealth" it is to feel high again, to have that brief but unmistakable feeling of letting go, or peace from the pain, of distraction from this crazy world. I am much impressed by the narrator of the poem who allows himself/herself to sit and consider the choice, and I invite you to do so as well.

And blessings to you, dear Shel, wherever you are in the other realms, I am sure you are still sharing your artistic self.

Please send water, the first medicine.

I know that when I am asked to donate to a worthy cause I usually say no. I really am broke for one thing, and I don't know how much of my donation will really get to those who need it, or so I tell myself. When Peacebang shared her conversation with Mrs. Belinda Williams of Allen Chapel A.M.E. Church in Baton Rouge, and explained that THESE FOLKS NEED WATER and then gave me a link to send it, I couldn't refuse, even though I don't actually have the money to pay the credit card at the moment. If you want to shop around for a better price on the internet, I encourage it, but if you are like me and don't have the time to do so, then just click on this link, grit your teeth and charge it to your credit card, and worry about paying it later. In two or three days, the water will be drunk by thirsty people who have lots of other stuff to worry about. Perhaps if they don't have to worry about where to get a drink of water, it might free up some energy to take some other survival steps. If you order six cases, you don't have to pay postage, and it will cost you $51.12. And please post a comment to let me know that you did it.

Ship to:
Allen Chapel A.M.E. Church
6175 Scenic Highway
Baton Rouge, LA 70807

Saint Precarious, help us

Dear St. Precarious:

We are in great need of your assistance at this point in our lives. I know that you are especially dedicated to Italian flex workers and Europeans in general, but we are desperately precarious here in the United States as well. We do need brand new ways of doing things. The money thing is not working very well at all. I know it is up to us to become more creative and take chances every day to live the lives we wish to live. So we humbly pray for your guidance and assistance as we move foreward this day. Amen.

11-11-11

Anyone out there understand numerology? I keep getting these cosmic winks of glancing at the clock when it is 11-11, now tonight it was an atomic clock and it was 11-11 and 11 seconds.

Letting Go: An Update on the Practice of Patience

[See related post] I have discovered that what is beautiful about this practice is that it leaves little room for negative self judgment. I had a couple of occasions, once when I got really angry at an irritating circumstance, and another time when I got angry at one of my children. I noticed that these bursts of anger were shorter lived than they used to be, and that I was able to consider being patient with myself at the end of them, which minimized the self-debasing practices that I used to engage in. It made it easier to let go.

There is a story of a monk and his teacher who were walking in the forest. They came upon a small creek and saw a beautiful elegantly dressed lady standing on the other side of the creek who was obviously trying to figure out how to cross the body of water. Without hesitation the teacher stepped across the creek, picked up the lady and carried her across, set her down, and without a word, continued on his way. His student was very troubled by witnessing this scene because he had been taught that he was not allowed to touch a woman under any circumstances. He was, however, hesitant to bring this up to his teacher, lest he show disrespect to him. So they continued to walk in silence for several more hours. Finally the young monk could bear it no longer and he said, “Excuse me teacher, but I am confused by your actions. You have taught me that it is wrong to touch a woman.” The teacher stopped and looked directly at his student and said simply: “I did pick her up, my student, but I set her down again. Why are you still carrying her?”

So my practice continues with a deeper understanding of the importance of letting go of self criticism.

Fourth Dimensional Cubby Holes

[For those of you my readers who have been taking some of your precious time to read my entries to date, you might notice a change in focus in this entry and my last about the crystal children. These two entries actually reflect much more closely the intention that I had in setting up this blog, but I will not be surprised if some of you lose interest and start thinking of Wally Nut as a real nut case. But alas and alack, so it goes. I do hope that some of you will continue to read my musings and I invite you to notice if any of what I say might resonate in your hearts. And please remember that any spiritual beliefs and practices will appear to be nonsense by many who do not share those perspectives. And I of course would welcome your thoughts or reflections about this.]

I had a dream last night where I came to some new understandings which I will attempt to describe here. The fourth dimension is a territory where souls who have left this plane (died) often roam around if they are not ready or don’t know the way to the Bridge of Flowers (see Crimson Circle) which is the entryway to the angelic realms. There are cubby holes in this fourth dimension where con artists reside. One could call these cubby holes regions or rooms in hell. No one goes there of course without their consent, but it is possible to get conned into it. I confess to my readers that I got totally conned into buying a timeshare in Orlando, not once but twice. My partner and I have finally come to terms that we made a big mistake and I am working to sell it off at a great loss. I have struggled for a few years now to understand how that happened and what lesson I was supposed to learn. In my dream last night I finally understood that these timeshare selling operations are reflections on this plane of those cubbyholes of hell where the con artists reside (and of course vice versa).

By getting taken in by them here, I now have a much greater understanding of how such operations work, and I am confident that I will be able to stay clear of them more easily when I pass over. Also, I am going to be trained in February as a Dream Walker and I believe this understanding will aid me greatly in this work. To describe briefly, these particular cubbyholes operate with an inner spiral. As you enter the space, you quickly spiral around so that you end up facing reflections of yourself at all points, and it appears there is no way out. There reflections will be images that perpetuate any and all unrealized hopes and dreams, and rely heavily on pieces of greed and hunger for privilege, power, and influence (that all but the most evolved of us still hold onto), as well as any and all unresolved "buttons" that can still be pushed, whether it is not wanting to be rude, not wanting to disobey rules, accepting authority, etc.

One thing that happened in my dream is that my partner and I were listening to one of these spiels, and in the middle of one of them, I looked at my partner and we simply got up and walked away without saying a word. When we got outside the building, someone there told us there was no way out to our car, and we basically ignored her and walked to our car anyway. In summary, there is no trick to getting away, one simply walks away. All is of course illusion, and unless one buys into the illusion, one is not caught. The spiral seems very real and the deeper one goes into it the more one feels trapped, but none of it has to have any power over us.

Crystal Children

The crystal children are coming in, and we’ve got to find a way to support their mothers. The Indigo kids have of course been coming in really stongly for a decade or more, and lots of times been able to sort of raise themselves, or at least they make so much noise that they are able to find resources. (These are the six year olds who call 911 when their mom's boyfriend hits her.) I have noticed that lots and lots of these new crystal children are coming into families headed by single women who are living in poverty. These moms are working one or two jobs, and are often connected with various men who are supporting the family financially only sporadically, if at all. These beautiful powerful children are not getting sufficient support and love. In lots of the literature about these children, it is said that they need extra support and protection, but there is an inadequate understanding that this is pretty hard to do if there is only one adult present in the family and she has to work 40 or 50 hours a week to pay the basic bills, and has to make all sorts of compromises in order to meet even basic needs of herself and these little ones.